My intention was to look for some summer dresses at that time since summer had just begun. I went to the usual spots where I usually buy my clothes but didn’t find anything. Mr. L and I kept walking around the mall because I felt empty and needed something to fill me. I felt like my quest to go to the mall to treat myself a little something was futile. So we kept walking and walking and walking until I finally decided to ask Mr. L to go with me to my favorite online store. I say favorite because I would always go to their website just to see handbags that I coveted because I felt that it was very imprudent to buy such handbags so I never had the chance to purchase anything from them. I also always thought that I usually get tired of wearing the same handbags over and over again that I usually send old handbags and handbags that I haven’t worn in over a year back home to the Philippines for my Tita Pia and my mom to enjoy or if they both don’t like them they are more than welcome to give it to someone else or our housekeeper, dear old Manang Delia. Yes, I usually send old bags back home to the Philippines so that someone who I appreciate will enjoy it rather than donating it to Salvation Army.
But somehow I realize how my age has affected my buying habits (in terms of handbags) compared to how I was when I was in my teens to my early twenties. When I was younger and single, I practically changed my bag every day. I had to make sure that my bag matched and complemented the outfit and shoes that I was wearing for that day. I would have different sets of handbags for work, daytime, and night time (like going out or “Gimmicks”). I would usually wear a big bag when I’d go shopping and go to work so I can stuff everything that I needed in one bag and I would usually have a teeny bag when I go out to clubs at night. Even the colors of the bags that I had were much brighter compared to the bags that I have now. The bags that I owned then were so much trendier whereas now they are more conservative and classic. I also tend to value quality nowadays rather than quantity because I noticed that although some of my cute bags were inexpensive they usually get broken very quickly. Also, I noticed that the more inexpensive a bag is the more uncomfortable it was to wear that I usually hurt my shoulder after carrying them after quite some time. Don’t get me wrong I don’t have a lot of good quality handbags since I am still transitioning.
So back to the day when I purchased my first big ticket item…and so Mr. L and I walked in to the store. I was quite hesitant to walk in because I remember being snubbed by the female attendant when I walked in there for first time a couple of years ago. This time the experience was very different, a middle aged Asian woman attended to me who was very warm, helpful and knowledgeable. So I asked her if could check the signature bag that most people get for the first time. I also checked the first big ticket item. Wow, it was amazing!
I’ve always wanted to get the bag “that most people get for the first time” (Note: Mr. L was suppose to buy me this bag a couple of years back for my birthday or was it as a Christmas present but I declined because I wasn’t sure how long I was going to love that bag and I didn’t want to waste Mr. L’s money) but somehow that bag just didn’t feel right. I wanted to go big well not really almost big so I opted to get my first big ticket item option.
Oh, it was a very unsettling feeling! I stood there for a while not sure if I should get it. I wasn’t convinced to get it due to my then situation at work and didn’t really want to spend any amount of money nor did I want to have any credit card debts. I froze for a bit and was carefully weighing in my decision. Mr. L told me that I deserved this big ticket item because he knows how much I wanted this bag so much. Every night I would go to this store’s website just to check the handbags over and over again. He even offered that if things go down south he will definitely help me pay for this big ticket item. So, I finally got it!
So, this is finally me signing my life away for my first purchase of my big ticket item. (Please excuse my hair; I didn’t get to blow-dry my hair when we left the house that day.)
After purchasing my big ticket item, I still wasn’t convinced if I deserved to reward myself with such a big ticket item that I decided to call my mom. She comforted me and told me that it was okay provided that I don’t do it that often as long as I do it at least once a year. She said that I should consider it as a reward to myself. After hearing from the two most important people in my life that it was okay---I was okay. I guess I did deserve it.
Mind you, just before I was left without a job I made sure I paid for my first big ticket item so I didn’t have to burden Mr. L and didn’t have to worry my mom about any hanging credit card debts.
This what I received in the mail after the purchase of my first big ticket item: a brochure and a letter. How cool and sophisticated. I was excited to see this in the mail and I'm keeping it as a keepsake. I'm not going to lie I kind of felt important lol
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